The “Twinkies” Eaten on Zombieland Were Not Real Twinkies

Daven Hiskey 26

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Being a vegan and raw-foodist, Woody Harrelson did not actually eat any real Twinkies in the movie Zombieland.  Rather, the “Twinkies” he was shown eating were made from cornmeal and were vegan-safe.

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  1. Kyle May 1, 2011 at 7:19 pm - Reply

    Why is it important he eat Vegan safe twinkies? What is in a twinkie a vegan can’t eat.


  2. shawna May 2, 2011 at 9:37 am - Reply

    1.) It’s important that he eat vegan “twinkies” because….wait for it…he’s vegan. 2.) They contain beef fat.

  3. Anon May 2, 2011 at 1:44 pm - Reply

    Eggs & Animal shortening (product made from beef fat)

  4. Anne May 2, 2011 at 8:13 pm - Reply

    Vegans can’t eat dairy.

  5. Anonymous May 2, 2011 at 10:33 pm - Reply

    Enriched Bleached Wheat Flour [Flour, Reduced Iron, B Vitamins (Niacin, Thiamine Mononitrate (B1), Riboflavin (B2), Folic Acid)], Corn Syrup, Sugar, High Fructose Corn Syrup, Water, Partially Hydrogenated Vegetable and/or Animal Shortening (Soybean, Cottonseed and/or Canola Oil, Beef Fat), Whole Eggs, Dextrose. Contains 2% or Less of: Modified Corn Starch, Glucose, Leavenings (Sodium Acid Pyrophosphate, Baking Soda, Monocalcium Phosphate), Sweet Dairy Whey, Soy Protein Isolate, Calcium and Sodium Caseinate, Salt, Mono and Diglycerides, Polysorbate 60, Soy Lecithin, Soy Flour, Cornstarch, Cellulose Gum, Sodium Stearoyl Lactylate, Natural and Artificial Flavors, Sorbic Acid (to Retain Freshness), Yellow 5, Red 40.

    @Kyle: Let’s try…oh I don’t know, starting with Animal Shortening made from beef fat? Then eggs, sweet *dairy* whey? they’re not vegan, if he’s a vegan, then yeah, he’d want to eat vegan safe foods. :/

  6. mike May 3, 2011 at 10:52 pm - Reply

    Oh my god, I would love a twinkie right now

  7. Jay Schwartz May 3, 2011 at 10:54 pm - Reply

    Supposedly, Tom Brady said “Life is like a twinkie, we all want the fluffy golden outside but it’s the cream filling that really matters.” As for me, I just can’t get enough off that ‘Cellulose Gum’. Tip: you can also find it in K-Y Jelly, toothpaste, laxatives, paint, soap detergents, and various paper products. Bon appetit! Try not to retch too hard.

  8. ComeToDaddy May 4, 2011 at 5:39 am - Reply

    @Jay Schwartz: There’s also another pretty corrosive chemical in the twinkies that’s also in K-Y, toothpaste, most laxatives, some paint, soap, and there’s a whole bunch of it in and around toilets, sewers, it’s even in feces and urine. I think it’s called Di-hydrogen oxide. Look it up!

  9. HomeList May 4, 2011 at 8:24 am - Reply

    Both twinkies and their vegan counter-part sound disgusting to eat

  10. Bill Coffin May 4, 2011 at 6:55 pm - Reply

    It’s not that vegans *can’t* eat dairy. We simply choose not to. It’s not like we get kicked out of the club if we get caught eating cheese.

    • Kabal July 25, 2014 at 7:00 am - Reply

      How to find a vegan;

      Step 1) Wait, a vegan will always tell you that they are a vegan.

  11. jimbo May 5, 2011 at 1:16 pm - Reply

    The ability to cook and eat meat was one of the main catalysts for human evolution.

    Fucking Veangerthals and there devolving ways.

  12. Lili May 5, 2011 at 2:03 pm - Reply

    Woody Harrell is a vegan?

    Well, that explains a lot!

  13. Kate May 7, 2011 at 8:52 pm - Reply

    Bill Coffin: If you knowingly and willingly eat dairy, you are not a vegan. It is that simple. Mistakes happen, and I personally feel that they do not mean you are not vegan, though I know many who would disagree with me, but if you are intentionally eating non-vegan foods, you are not a vegan.

  14. Scott May 8, 2011 at 1:29 am - Reply



  15. ComeToDaddy May 8, 2011 at 5:24 pm - Reply

    Actually, nevermind. I just remembered i’m making shit up.

  16. Hugh Jass May 8, 2011 at 8:25 pm - Reply

    vegetarianism/veganism is a luxury of the first world

  17. Corkie May 14, 2011 at 7:25 pm - Reply

    Veganism ‘is basically a huge transhuman space opera in a dying galactic Empire where hyperspace is unraveling. Everybody is trying to get to this Dyson Sphere in the farthest corner of known space before hyperspace stops working completely. Problem is, a bunch of techno-cultists have already entered the sphere and kind of have a little control over it. Much of the sphere’s interior is unmapped, and as more and more galactic refugees our into it, a war is brewing between the tech-loving bad guys who are building vast armies of AI and the infighting refugees from the old order who want to set up the same broken system of government and commerce on a new frontier. Even a world as vast as Septimus isn’t big enough for the two camps, and so warfare seems inevitable.’

    Totally out of contxt and makes no bloody sense but who the fuck cares, I don’t know who this dude is and people seem to be quoting him like a sort of buddha

    If you go back far enough we’re all related to plants (yes even you uneducated lot) so how’s it better eating one lot of relatives with slightly lesse evolved forms of nervous system than the other.

    • Daven Hiskey
      Daven May 20, 2011 at 3:03 am - Reply

      @Corkie: That might just be the most random non-spam comment that’s ever been posted on this site. :-)

  18. cj May 15, 2011 at 12:26 am - Reply

    It should read IN Zombieland, not ON Zombieland. If it’s a single episode or movie it’s IN and if it’s a series you use ON. Zombieland is a single film, so you should say IN Zombieland. “Remember that part in Zombieland when Woody Harrelson killed that zombie with hedge clippers?”

    • Daven Hiskey
      Daven May 19, 2011 at 7:43 pm - Reply

      @cj: First time in a long time the grammar police have called me on something that wasn’t just a typo. I actually didn’t know that. Thanks! ;-)

  19. Dave May 20, 2011 at 10:56 am - Reply

    That GOD Woody didn’t have to eat an actual Twinkie. Ask Harvey Milk about Twinkies. Yeah. We don’t want Woody Harrelson walking around fucknuts crazy now, do we?

  20. Elle July 2, 2011 at 9:41 pm - Reply

    How can someone so badass be so green?

  21. No One July 27, 2011 at 11:17 am - Reply

    fact, no such thing as a true vegon. did no one watch scott pilgrim versus the world? vegans have supernatural powers, and i have never met a vegan with powers, so obviously they are eating something from an animal in secret.

    Also, @Daven. Zombieland is more of a reference to the planet being overrun by zombies. not just the theme park. Do you live in the world? no, you live on the world. The people in the movie live on the planet (aka – Zombieland) therefor, they live on Zombieland. If the planet itself gets a name change to Zombieland, then they would be living on the planet Zombieland. However if it was a movie about a giant theme park called Zombieland that they live in, then it could be in Zombieland instead of on Zombieland. The way things are worded can be changed if the use of the word changes. Then again many things in the english language isn’t very logical, so it might still be “in Zombieland”.

  22. Scott October 31, 2011 at 12:05 am - Reply

    Interesting tidbit :)

  23. Alice October 6, 2012 at 4:03 pm - Reply

    I don’t know why everyone was being so douchey to Kyle, it seems to me that he was asking a genuine question. You make us vegans look like douchebags.

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